y? i think i nid a reason y? i blame nobody... when all those incident happen 2day, it feels lyk we r lyk last time quralleling over small matter. last wk was really a diaster 2 me, it feels the "line" that has been keeping us 2gether 4 dis past 1yrs & 7mths has been cut off and we have lost the "line" that has been keeping us 2gether. i REALLY FEEL THAT DEEP DOWN IN MY HEART!!! I WAS SO SCARED!!! IN THE MRT WHILE TRAVELING BACK, I FIND MYSELF IN A ISOLATED ISLAND, I FEEL LONELY, I FEEL SCARED, I FELT DARKNESS DEVOURING ME, I'VE LOST ALL THE HAPPINESS, I'VE LOST EVERYTHING!!! 2 let u noe, i cried in the train while on the way back, e experience was as good as both of us has alrdy broken up b4 we took e train. rmb e bk i told u bout my sch gave out was bout sex but in e bk it also toks bout in relationship, what a Wo(Men) want. It talks alot & i find it very true. i dun wan 2 tok much bout dis in here, i'll show u next time. What am i fearing? was the nick i put down ytd. I was fearing of distance, fearing of being a guy hu duno wad her gf wan, fearing of being a let down, fearing of u being snatched away, fearing of lots of things. I dun care whether u have ur periods, u have bad temper, u r sian½, or wadeva, izzit really hard 4 me 2 keep u calm and cool u down. i duno wad have i done but seems lyk most of e things i have done reminds u of alot of bad experience. i noe it's a very un-usual sight 4 guys 2 b so "auto", it's not very sightly... when i meet my friends, had i ever tried of leaving u alone and go 2 them? yes i admit once but after tat incident i did not, i juz wish 2 b alone, JUST BOTH U AND ME!!! RITE NOW I FEEL I'M LEAVING IN A WORLD WHERE THERE'S ONLY YOU AND ME, I HATE OTHERS AS I FIND IT IRRITATING, THEY ARE DISTURBING AND IRRITATING ME!!! I SO SO SO HATE IT!!! SERIOUSLY ON 1ST JULY I REALLY WAN JUST THE BOTH OF US TO BE THERE TOGETHER ALONE LIKE OUR OWN HOUSE AND OUR OWN ROOM WITH NOBODY ELSE LIKE WHAT WE HAVE BEEN TOKING E LAST TIME, OUR OWN HSE, PLACE WHERE ONLY DERE IS BOTH OF US. jealousy, i feel the same as u, whenever i heard e name of jian ming, yao de, aaron, or ur friends. I FEEL THEY ARE A THREAT TO ME, TO ME THEY ARE TRYING TO SNATCH U AWAY FROM ME & EVERYTIME I WOULD TRY 2 KEEP QUIET AND TRY 2 KEEP MYSELF BZ SO THAT I WUN THINK TOO MUCH!!! I'M THAT SELFISH UNTIL U'RE MINE, NOBODY CAN SHARE!!! U BELONG TO ME!!! but i can't do much coz it's ur freedom of ur friends, i can't control ur freedom of choosing friends. it's nt fair 2 u... MON U TOLD ME U R MEETING JIAN MING OUT, I'M REALLY LOST OF WORDS, I DUNO WAD TO SAY TO U EXCEPT OK & I PRETEND I'M STRONG AND FINE WITH IT BUT DEEP DOWN INSIDE, I WAS TREMBLING IN FEAR & SCARED, I FEEL THAT HE HAS CAME TO TAKE REVENGE, HE'S HERE TO SNATCH U AWAY FROM ME. I STILL RMB E DAY WHERE U TOLD ME ADNAN ASK U DIS QS: WAD IF U FELT IN LOVE WITH JIAN MING AGAIN & WAD WILL HAPPEN 2 ME some sort lidat and ur class gal was two timing, IT MAKES ME REALLY SCARED WAD IF THIS REALLY HAPPEN? WAD SHOULD I DO? i can't take away ur freedom, i noe u lyk freedom, u dun wan 2 b controled by ppl, u wan 2 do wad's rite. SIMPLY SAID ALL DIS, I'M SCARED, I'M FEARING OF THINGS, I'M FEARING OF MY ROLE AS A BF, I'M SCARED OF LOSING U E MOST!!! I DUN WAN OUR RELATIONSHIP TO BE CUT OFF JUZ LIDAT, I WAN OUR RELATIONSHIP TO BE IMPREGNABLE!!!
i really have alot alot alot of things 2 say but most of the time i would rather keep quiet and let it go as, it's a guy duty 2 give in to his gf & it can maintain e relationship. i want to let u have everything ur way, ur words r verdict 2 me, once u say it, dis is it. i hate troubles, i hate qurallels, i noe if couples do not have qurallels would b very weird. i noe no relationship can b a smooth journey, dere's always ups and downs in a relationship, taking it as obstacles.
Dear Dear, can we pls dun qurallel nemore? i hate quralleling with u, i detest quralleling, quralleling is my "curse", everytime when dere's qurallel, it feels that it's trying 2 break us apart. I WAN TO WIPE OUT QURALLEL!!!
P.S. I Love You, Ong Mei Yun. I dun care whether izzit too late 2 say dis or wadeva or u find it, it's alrdy no use saying all dis. But i will still say it, Ong Mei Yun, U're My Everything, My World, My Heart, My Soul. I Love You. *Muack*
